Monday, February 2, 2015

Kids say the darndest things

Just a little background on myself before getting started. I'm a WAHM (work at home mom) I watch kids daily so I can be a stay at home mom. Lucky enough for me I had a free day today and decided to take my very opinionated and talkative three year old shopping. We hit a few sales, 75% off at Claires and 75% off at Bath and Body Works. It was heaven for this frugal mommy. We even ate free at Chick Fil A. Then came the embarrassing part. Target.

I have a couple of gift cards to Target and decided today I was going to buy something for myself. This might not sound like much, but last time I had a Target gift card I bought my husband a video game.. Yes, I am that kind of person. I can't spend money on myself and when I do I feel horrible. I guess that's why I became a coupon addict. . . So it's that time of the year.. January.. Which in Savannah means swimsuits are out. Ick! Oh to be my 17 year old self once more with my tight tummy and firm booty. Oh, and no stretchmarks! Gah, one can wish. While looking at all the teeny little bikinis I finally found a swimsuit that appeared to be perfect. The bottoms were bottoms and actually covered everything. The top was a secret pushup with ruffles that gives the appearance that  someone might have larger breasts. Perfect! Just what this itty bitty titty mama needs! So my daughter and I make our way to the fitting rooms. Today she is actually cooperating with me. It may or may not be the fact that I bought her princess lip gloss... Right about now her entire bottom half of her face is slimy and glittery, but to be honest, as long as she is sitting down quietly I really don't mind.  I take her out of the stroller, let her pick which lip glosses she wants to take into the fitting room then go in to try on the swimsuit. .. While undressing my daughter decides to say very loudly, "mama! You's naked!" I hear a giggle... It's not coming from my daughter. It's not from me. Not from the nice lady at the fitting room desk. No.. . It's coming from the mens side... So I try to distract my daughter with her lip gloss and then it happens. "BOOBIES!!! Mama your boobies are showing. BOOBIES BOOBIES BOOBIES"

Then I hear it again.. More giggling from a man. In all fairness, he was trying to hide the fact that he found my daughter hilarious, but the damage was done. I was completely mortified. The sad thing is, I didn't even get to try on the bottoms to the swimsuit. Who knows what would have been said! I quickly gathered up what dignity I had left, put my top back on, and hauled butt out of Target. All the while my daughter was sitting in her stroller repeating the word boobies with this little devious grin on her face.

The life lesson here. Maybe my ass shouldn't be wearing a bikini...

- Side note, this was written in January but I'm just now getting around to posting it. 

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